Oak Trees and the Sovereignty of God
Sometimes, out of nowhere, God moves you in a direction that you never knew you’d go. When Blaise was only a baby, God told me to get ready to move. I did. In between newborn feedings, raising our two other small kids, ministry life, and homeschooling, I began the process of downsizing everything we owned and getting ready. I didn’t know exactly where we were going, but I knew we were moving.
Bryan and I started dreaming together and praying. We were those weird backyard chicken people. We were planting fruit trees in our small yard and considering how many small goats we could fit into our place without the other neighbors noticing. We began to realize that we wanted more property to raise our family on. We wanted our own homestead. We wanted to be self-sustainable, so that the lean seasons of ministry wouldn’t be so hard on our growing family.
Did You Know There Was a Ukrainian Orphan Crisis?!
Y’all, I just got back home from an incredible week at the Clarity to Courage Conference that was hosted by Avery Forrest. I am overwhelmed by how amazingly God is working in the lives of women all over the world. I was able to meet dear online friends for the first time in person, and let me tell you, in person is sooo much better than doing life online.
While I was there, we had the most incredible worship services, and the speakers just delivered powerful Christ-Centered messages again and again. The really neat thing that there were these unintended threads that spoke of building a Kingdom legacy woven into what was shared throughout the whole event. It was beautiful. Again and again, I just felt absolutely blown away by the amazing God I serve. His riches really are boundless. When His people come together in unity, amazing things happen.
This brings me to my friend Cate. She has three kids and one on the way. God laid it on her heart to host Ukranian orphans in her home this Christmas through an organization called, “Host Orphans Worldwide.”
Read moreGrieving with Hope
The past six months have been filled with grief for me. I watched close friends struggle through the suicide of a family member. I could see my grandmother was nearing her end. A freak accident ended up in the death of my little cockatiel. A dog attack on our farm killed my favorite goat who I had hand raised from a baby. Friends lost loved ones to Covid. Finally, my grandmother met Jesus face to face.
Grief has been a constant companion in these days. Here are some things I have learned walking in the valley of the shadow of death.
Jesus is here too. He holds you when you can’t hold onto Him.
Read moreUntil We Meet Again
My precious grandmother is with Jesus now. I've been so sad and there just aren't words when you lose your last grandparent. I think the loss is harder as an adult than it was as a child.
Mammaw was one of a kind. She was spirited, feisty, funny, and loved to overindulge those she called her own. She was absolutely not what anyone expected a pastor’s wife to be.
Read moreYou Were Made For More
Few things are more humbling than being a farmer. One lapse in judgment can result in death. The permanency of that is sobering.
Yesterday morning, I was woken up to chaos in our chicken coop. I jumped up, put my robe on, and stumbled outside looking around as chickens were screaming and hiding. I scanned the skies but the predator was gone. Instead, there was an empty nesting box with a full clutch of eggs that should have hatched soon. Abby’s favorite hen was missing. Something had gotten her. I had forgotten to close the coop the night before. I knew better.
Read moreMy Son is Named Peace...
I remember like it was yesterday. I was in a hotel room with Bryan, and we had just spent the whole day at a church planting boot camp. We had just endured a messy and painful exit from a ministry we had loved. We had lost our main source of income and were praying about a career trajectory that would surely only mean poverty and misunderstanding from others in the near future. We both felt the call. We asked ourselves, “Wasn’t Jesus worth everything?”
God was calling us to plant a church in the same city we had just invested in for three years before having our ministry crash and burn. I mean, who plants a church in the same place where they have just been rejected? Surely, only troublemakers or crazy people do that. We didn’t want to be either. We did want to obey.
Read moreBuilding Arks in the Deserts
There are whispers in Creation that echo of the Eden we lost. Like when early mornings give us trees that dazzle with dew drops, you feel the beauty touch something deep inside and you ache for something more. When winter drags on and the ground is brown and dead and cold, sometimes you just ache for it to be over. You wonder if winter will ever really end?
Then, sure as the sun, spring comes again, and clovers and buds and wildflowers emerge almost overnight to announce the coming of brighter days ahead. You feel you can breathe again. Your soul feels the warmth, and these signs remind us it will not always be winter.
Read moreAt the Grave of What Cannot Be Undone
Then, it happened. Our guardian livestock dogs didn’t come to breakfast one morning. I knew something was wrong…
Read moreMy Thoughts Right Now
I have been quiet on the blog for the past couple of months, because I honestly haven’t known what to say.
Like many of you, I have been grieving over my loss of normal and loss of so many other things. My family is fortunate. Our loss is not as as great as that of others. The loss stings even still.
As a mother I have been processing current events for our children and have been doing what I can to help my children weather this pandemic in a way that they come out emotionally healthy and feel loved and cared for.
As a business owner, I have watched friends suffer, lose much that they have worked hard for, and have tried to make a difference where I could for my clients and others.
Read morePax Means Peace
I went to Walmart tonight with Bryan. While we were there, a young mom was struggling with a kid who was having a horrible meltdown. The kid was so loud that everyone in Walmart heard her. To say it was awkward is an understatement. It was close to unbearable for everyone, including the mom. While everyone who was passing by whispered to each other how they would spank the kid or stated why they would never want kids, my heart went out to her.
It would be unfair to say that I was better than everyone else. To say that I'm a nicer person than them is simply not true. I used to be them before I was her.
Read moreFarm Wisdom from Poop
So, if you are just now following my blog, you may not know this, but I live on a farm here in Gautier, Mississippi. I’m a huge animal lover, so naturally, we have quite a few animals too. I truly love the life that I get to live. I am super blessed. I dreamed to be able to do this years ago and had no idea that God would actually bring those dreams to life. I had just hoped He would.
Sometimes, living your dream is way different than actually thinking about your dream.
Read moreOur January Miracle
Incidentally, we’ve spotted a coyote on our farm again and again lately, and we’ve lost several chickens to his sneak attacks during the night. Though we have deterred some attempts, we haven’t stopped them all. Needless to say, I haven’t been sleeping as well as usual, and we have all been on higher alert.
Read morePhotos on a Dented Fridge
If you come into my farm house, you’ll see a great room with a living room to one side and a long kitchen table on the other. You would naturally walk in and sit at the table as I poured you a steaming mug of coffee. You’d look over at a dented refrigerator and wonder why it doesn’t have handles (there is a story that will have to be told later). You’d see these photos taped across one side.
Read moreFinding a Home
It was last week, and we were supposed to be doing a staycation at my parents’ camp in Plum Bluff Estates. We had been looking forward to getting away and resting, but the trip had turned out far less restful than I had hoped. The river was up, so instead of a week of playing on the sandbar with the kids, we were altogether in a small place and going stir crazy. The river was so high that most of the residents had left, so it was a ghost town.
Read moreSolo Cups & Seedlings
At the beginning of this year, I had a little greenhouse, and I started out different varieties of lettuce from seeds in red solo cups. As the tiny plants formed and grew, I got too busy to manage them as well as they needed, and I left them in the cups for too long. Soon, they outgrew their space, and their growth started to be their end. They were becoming root bound, and if I didn’t move them to a bigger container, they would atrophy and die.
Read moreWhy My Blog Was Silent for a Year
Have you ever felt like your life was just one big, disorganized mess? That no matter how hard you tried or how genuine your intentions were that you couldn’t get it completely right. You were trying. You really were. Things were just falling apart faster than you could fix them. Treading water day after day kept you alive but was not your idea of thriving.
Read moreFaith Like An Acorn
God is infinitely good and kind to me. Years ago, when we first found this property. It was for sale, and our church had just received the lowest offering in a while. We had medical debt we had collected while planting our church. The housing market had crashed, and nothing was selling in our area.
Yet, God works in spite of circumstances, and He planted a desire in my heart to pray and ask Him for this property. It started with this oak tree.
Read moreThe Saddest Sunday of My Life
Warning: This is a troubling blog. It contains a graphic account. Please do not let your children read this.
It was a rainy day. The kind that is overcast and chilly enough for a lightweight jacket. I almost wore my rain boots to church but opted for leather heeled booties instead. I dressed in black. It was appropriate. I just didn't know how appropriate.
Read moreResurrection Kid
It was a beautiful day. The kind that only comes after everything goes wrong. I had worked hard the day before and lost one of the injured goats and buried her in the field beside us. I could still see the dark dirt covering her gentle face as the earth took her into her final sleep.
But now, the sun was shining. The temperature was just right. The birds were singing all around in the trees. Sadness was being warmed away.
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